PARENTING CLASSES YOU NEED IT
Parenting can be the toughest job in the world, indeed it is. Even the smartest ones give up on finding the perfect equation for the perfect relationship with your kids. You know why? Because there is no such thing as perfect, there are only ideals and appropriates.
If you are a newbie in the world of parenting, it will be as twice as hard for you. Let’s be honest, all of us wants to be the best parents for our child and who wouldn’t. However, most of us are still uncertain if our so-called way of parenting is correct. If you want to learn a lot of helpful strategies to cope up with the staple challenges of parenting, then help is on the way.
Parenting classes are all the rage of today. Some even take classes even if the baby is still on its way. Parenting classes are facilitated by expert instructors that give out lessons to aid moms on the need. They give out helpful information on different aspects of parenting. If necessary, they will even require some parents to undergo structured parenting program that will teach them a step by step approach on parenting.
The only misconception about parenting classes is that some parents think that it can change their ways of raising a child. What you need to remember is that, these lessons only serve as your guide and the implementation of such all depends upon you. But when the time comes that a real change is required in your usual parenting technique, your instincts will tell you so and you will know it.
If you think that only problematic parents take parenting lessons, you are absolutely wrong. What you don’t know is that even healthy families tend to scout for help if they need it. If you’re one amongst the big majority who want to attend but just don’t have the time to attend parenting classes, you are just in luck because parenting classes are well established on the web. You can just easily take online courses in the comforts of your own home. How’s that for a class?
Parenting is truly the hardest job one could ever have and to note all of these are a lifetime commitment. Parenting classes are mere supplementation for those who wants to seek help from experts. There is no right or wrong way in parenting, however there will always be what we call as the acceptable way.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Inspired Parent Before Conception, Pregnancy, Birth and Baby
Inspired Parenting
There are a few different elements involved in inspired parenting which will I will address in a series of articles.
One of the basics of inspired parenting is the whole idea of co-parenting with the Universe, God, Angels or whatever word/image fits for you. Inspired parenting invites in the support of the universe so you don't have to do it alone.
When you believe you have complete and sole responsibility and have to do it alone, parenting can feel overwhelming (even before conception or during pregnancy!).
When you realize that you are being loved and supported as you parent or prepare for pregnancy the whole experience becomes so much easier and joyful for all concerned (including baby).
Inspired Parenting in Pregnancy or Before
As you actually invite the universe to help you in your different tasks, you are opening the door to great joy and fulfillment in pregnancy and family life.
So every day you can ask that the universe to help you prepare for your baby, to keep your baby safe and to support his/her healthy development. You can ask that it easy for you to feel good, have energy and enjoy the pregnancy.
You can visualise all the support you need during pregnancy and when baby arrives. And any worries you have can be handed over to the angels so that they can sort it out.
In inspired parenting there is trust that all is well, that your baby is safe, that you are protected and cared for and that you can have fun.
There are a few different elements involved in inspired parenting which will I will address in a series of articles.
One of the basics of inspired parenting is the whole idea of co-parenting with the Universe, God, Angels or whatever word/image fits for you. Inspired parenting invites in the support of the universe so you don't have to do it alone.
When you believe you have complete and sole responsibility and have to do it alone, parenting can feel overwhelming (even before conception or during pregnancy!).
When you realize that you are being loved and supported as you parent or prepare for pregnancy the whole experience becomes so much easier and joyful for all concerned (including baby).
Inspired Parenting in Pregnancy or Before
As you actually invite the universe to help you in your different tasks, you are opening the door to great joy and fulfillment in pregnancy and family life.
So every day you can ask that the universe to help you prepare for your baby, to keep your baby safe and to support his/her healthy development. You can ask that it easy for you to feel good, have energy and enjoy the pregnancy.
You can visualise all the support you need during pregnancy and when baby arrives. And any worries you have can be handed over to the angels so that they can sort it out.
In inspired parenting there is trust that all is well, that your baby is safe, that you are protected and cared for and that you can have fun.
ARE YOU THE BEST PARENT
Parent as Leader. Parent Leadership. What does it really mean? Do you think that as a parent you are also a leader and if so, how do you go about that?
I have always found the words Parent and Parenting to be very emotive. For me, they bring up a feeling of exhaustion, frustration and a feeling of being stuck. I'm not sure if this is only me but I have never found these words at all inspiring. Let's face it, bringing a child into the word and caring for them, ensuring that they grow up to be a fine young adult is so much more than about parenting. I remember saying to someone ages ago that I am not a parent; I am a relationship builder and that felt much more freeing for me. I then went on to replace this with the word Leader; I am a leader for my child. To me that feels more like a task to take, a result to achieve, an inspiring outcome to work towards.
Our radio show last week was all about this topic and it really got me thinking of the similarities between parent coaching and corporate coaching. You see, they are not much different. In executive coaching a person comes to a coach to grow and improve their leadership style, perhaps they need to step into a leadership role they feel uncomfortable in, or perhaps they need to make uncomfortable decisions as a leader. Well, parent coaching is the same thing; without knowing it, clients come to me because an area in their parent leadership needs developing. There is a place as a parent that they need to step into and they know it. Despite how ever many books you read, you will not find the answer to this. You see, most of the parenting books tell you what you need to do and not who you need to become to do it. That, I guess, is where my book differs and is why parents who read it feel relief, because they realise that actually, to change things at home they just need to make little adjustments. When we see ourselves as a leader we can see hope where before we saw, well let's just say, our child not doing anything we say. When we see ourselves as a leader we make different choices. Like Benjamin Zander askes, "What am I doing that is not allowing this person to shine?" It puts everything in a different perspective.
A Parent Leader thinks differently and asks different questions of themselves and their child For example, instead of asking, "Why will my child not do anything I ask?" they will ask, "What do I need to do to teach my child responsibility?" Instead of, "What is wrong with my child and how can I fix this?" they will ask, "What do I need to change about my style to support my child in this result? Instead of "Why does my child always speak to me in this way?" they ask, "What am I doing that is allowing another person to treat me like this?" Instead of. "I don't think my child could handle that!" they ask, "If I believe my child could handle this, would I behave differently?"
As you can see, it is entirely a different mindset and as I am sure you can imagine, it produces different results than merely parenting, whatever that is anyway.
So how can you access your leadership and what is required of a good parent leader?
For this I want to turn to the great book, The Four Fold Way, which draws on ancient wisdom and I believe can show us the way forward. In ancient wisdom it was believed that to raise a well adjusted child, four types of leadership were required; the way of the Warrior, Teacher, Visionary and Healer. Now in ancient and past times, children would have gone to different people for these things and certainly within tribes, people would have been given these designated jobs. Think of your own childhood, who was the person you went to when you needed someone to be strong. What about when you needed to heal some pain or have someone gets excited about your future plans? Anyway, you see where I am going. Now in modern day society, this does not happen. Children don't have these different people to go to so as the Parent, we need to search inside ourselves and learn to become all of them when our child needs us to.
I have always found the words Parent and Parenting to be very emotive. For me, they bring up a feeling of exhaustion, frustration and a feeling of being stuck. I'm not sure if this is only me but I have never found these words at all inspiring. Let's face it, bringing a child into the word and caring for them, ensuring that they grow up to be a fine young adult is so much more than about parenting. I remember saying to someone ages ago that I am not a parent; I am a relationship builder and that felt much more freeing for me. I then went on to replace this with the word Leader; I am a leader for my child. To me that feels more like a task to take, a result to achieve, an inspiring outcome to work towards.
Our radio show last week was all about this topic and it really got me thinking of the similarities between parent coaching and corporate coaching. You see, they are not much different. In executive coaching a person comes to a coach to grow and improve their leadership style, perhaps they need to step into a leadership role they feel uncomfortable in, or perhaps they need to make uncomfortable decisions as a leader. Well, parent coaching is the same thing; without knowing it, clients come to me because an area in their parent leadership needs developing. There is a place as a parent that they need to step into and they know it. Despite how ever many books you read, you will not find the answer to this. You see, most of the parenting books tell you what you need to do and not who you need to become to do it. That, I guess, is where my book differs and is why parents who read it feel relief, because they realise that actually, to change things at home they just need to make little adjustments. When we see ourselves as a leader we can see hope where before we saw, well let's just say, our child not doing anything we say. When we see ourselves as a leader we make different choices. Like Benjamin Zander askes, "What am I doing that is not allowing this person to shine?" It puts everything in a different perspective.
A Parent Leader thinks differently and asks different questions of themselves and their child For example, instead of asking, "Why will my child not do anything I ask?" they will ask, "What do I need to do to teach my child responsibility?" Instead of, "What is wrong with my child and how can I fix this?" they will ask, "What do I need to change about my style to support my child in this result? Instead of "Why does my child always speak to me in this way?" they ask, "What am I doing that is allowing another person to treat me like this?" Instead of. "I don't think my child could handle that!" they ask, "If I believe my child could handle this, would I behave differently?"
As you can see, it is entirely a different mindset and as I am sure you can imagine, it produces different results than merely parenting, whatever that is anyway.
So how can you access your leadership and what is required of a good parent leader?
For this I want to turn to the great book, The Four Fold Way, which draws on ancient wisdom and I believe can show us the way forward. In ancient wisdom it was believed that to raise a well adjusted child, four types of leadership were required; the way of the Warrior, Teacher, Visionary and Healer. Now in ancient and past times, children would have gone to different people for these things and certainly within tribes, people would have been given these designated jobs. Think of your own childhood, who was the person you went to when you needed someone to be strong. What about when you needed to heal some pain or have someone gets excited about your future plans? Anyway, you see where I am going. Now in modern day society, this does not happen. Children don't have these different people to go to so as the Parent, we need to search inside ourselves and learn to become all of them when our child needs us to.
Friday, August 29, 2008
TIPS TO STOP BED WETTING
TIPS TO STOP BED WETTING
O STOP BEDBedwetting is quite normal when it is among the infants. It turns out to be a problem when the parents find it at the time of their school going stage or sometimes beyond that. Bedwetting is an involuntary urination during one's sleep which develops frustration among the parents and embarrassment among the children.
Bedwetting is quite a delicate subject to deal with as any punishment or restriction like teasing, scolding etc. gives our negative result. Correct way has to be adopted by the parents in order to overcome this problem. Rather than making child feel bad about this problem of bedwetting, parents have to try and assure child that this could be easily overcome.
Below are some tips that could help the child have night without wetting.
1. A very normal idea to avoid bedwetting is to take the child to toilet before they go to bed. This should be a regular routine so that they go to bed with their bladder empty. It should also be taken care that the child has easy access to toilet in case they need to urinate waking up at night.
2. Another tip is to avoid plenty of fluid intakes at night so that they have lesser tendency to urinate during night that can prevent bedwetting. Parents can stop feeding them with fluids at least two hours before they go to bed.
3. Always use a plastic or rubber sheet that could protect your bed from getting wet by urine and smelling due to bedwetting. This will make it easy in changing bed and child will also not feel much disturbed with wet sheets.
4. Building confidence in a child who wets the bed is more important than treating him otherwise. The feeling of self-belief will help a child overcome bedwetting to a large extend.
5. Praise from the parents when the child does not wet is also as important as how parents try to overcome it. This will make the child understand that the positive side of it is not to wet and be dry till he or she wakes up in the morning.
O STOP BEDBedwetting is quite normal when it is among the infants. It turns out to be a problem when the parents find it at the time of their school going stage or sometimes beyond that. Bedwetting is an involuntary urination during one's sleep which develops frustration among the parents and embarrassment among the children.
Bedwetting is quite a delicate subject to deal with as any punishment or restriction like teasing, scolding etc. gives our negative result. Correct way has to be adopted by the parents in order to overcome this problem. Rather than making child feel bad about this problem of bedwetting, parents have to try and assure child that this could be easily overcome.
Below are some tips that could help the child have night without wetting.
1. A very normal idea to avoid bedwetting is to take the child to toilet before they go to bed. This should be a regular routine so that they go to bed with their bladder empty. It should also be taken care that the child has easy access to toilet in case they need to urinate waking up at night.
2. Another tip is to avoid plenty of fluid intakes at night so that they have lesser tendency to urinate during night that can prevent bedwetting. Parents can stop feeding them with fluids at least two hours before they go to bed.
3. Always use a plastic or rubber sheet that could protect your bed from getting wet by urine and smelling due to bedwetting. This will make it easy in changing bed and child will also not feel much disturbed with wet sheets.
4. Building confidence in a child who wets the bed is more important than treating him otherwise. The feeling of self-belief will help a child overcome bedwetting to a large extend.
5. Praise from the parents when the child does not wet is also as important as how parents try to overcome it. This will make the child understand that the positive side of it is not to wet and be dry till he or she wakes up in the morning.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE WORK FOR YOUR CHILDREN SAKE
MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE WORK FOR YOUR CHILDREN SAKE
I've seen a lot of couples who are living happily together for the first years of marriage, but for some reasons fell apart after a number of years of being together. It's so sad to think that what was once a happy relationship turned into a nightmare.
Once a relationship failed the first reason that comes into our mind is infidelity. That one or the other has a third party. That may be true, but we cannot disregard the fact that there may be a lot of other reasons. Instead of dealing with the negatives, let me share with you my thoughts on what are the essentials in a lasting relationship.
Communication and intimacy are vital in a relationship. I believe that the absence of communication or the lack of it creates discord in a relationship. Likewise, miscommunication is another major factor. It is important that we communicate what we feel, but it is even more important to learn how to communicate it. A lot of times, we feel down in the dumps for being misunderstood, but we fail to realize that it was our manner of communicating that trigger the fight. Tact must always be practiced and we should truly listen to what the other is saying to better understand what is being conveyed.
Appreciation is equally important in a relationship. Be grateful for all the good things that your partner is doing for you. Let him feel that he is very much appreciated. If your spouse feels that he is appreciated and valued, it doubles his joy and inspires him to do even greater things. Be lavish with praise and it will surely do wonders.
Support each other. When one dances, the other claps. Support his interests, hobbies, ideas. Find out his childhood dreams and help him realize that dream. Always be there for him. His boss may not see his value, his friends may turn their backs on him, but your support will make a big difference. After all, what you think and believe in is what matters most. Your support will help him cope up with everyday stress and will make him a better and happier person.
Commitment. It is the commitment to the relationship that makes the marriage last forever. There may be times when you may feel like running away from it, but remember that 'LOVE' is not a feeling. It doesn't stop when the feelings end. During moments of trials and temptations, be reminded of the vows that you made and your strong commitment to that vow will lead you back to the right track.
Pray together. Cliché' as it may sound, but it's true. The family that prays together stays together. Make God the center of your married life and you would have a stronger bond. Should problems come your way, you will be confident that you will all surpass it because you know that you have a God who is bigger than all your problems and concerns.
I've seen a lot of couples who are living happily together for the first years of marriage, but for some reasons fell apart after a number of years of being together. It's so sad to think that what was once a happy relationship turned into a nightmare.
Once a relationship failed the first reason that comes into our mind is infidelity. That one or the other has a third party. That may be true, but we cannot disregard the fact that there may be a lot of other reasons. Instead of dealing with the negatives, let me share with you my thoughts on what are the essentials in a lasting relationship.
Communication and intimacy are vital in a relationship. I believe that the absence of communication or the lack of it creates discord in a relationship. Likewise, miscommunication is another major factor. It is important that we communicate what we feel, but it is even more important to learn how to communicate it. A lot of times, we feel down in the dumps for being misunderstood, but we fail to realize that it was our manner of communicating that trigger the fight. Tact must always be practiced and we should truly listen to what the other is saying to better understand what is being conveyed.
Appreciation is equally important in a relationship. Be grateful for all the good things that your partner is doing for you. Let him feel that he is very much appreciated. If your spouse feels that he is appreciated and valued, it doubles his joy and inspires him to do even greater things. Be lavish with praise and it will surely do wonders.
Support each other. When one dances, the other claps. Support his interests, hobbies, ideas. Find out his childhood dreams and help him realize that dream. Always be there for him. His boss may not see his value, his friends may turn their backs on him, but your support will make a big difference. After all, what you think and believe in is what matters most. Your support will help him cope up with everyday stress and will make him a better and happier person.
Commitment. It is the commitment to the relationship that makes the marriage last forever. There may be times when you may feel like running away from it, but remember that 'LOVE' is not a feeling. It doesn't stop when the feelings end. During moments of trials and temptations, be reminded of the vows that you made and your strong commitment to that vow will lead you back to the right track.
Pray together. Cliché' as it may sound, but it's true. The family that prays together stays together. Make God the center of your married life and you would have a stronger bond. Should problems come your way, you will be confident that you will all surpass it because you know that you have a God who is bigger than all your problems and concerns.
Friday, August 22, 2008
YOUR CHILD NEED A STORY
TELL YOUR CHILD A STORY
Do you envy those people who are natural storytellers? Perhaps you want to make reading stories more fun, but lack the confidence or know-how? Below are 10 simple things you can do to help make reading stories more fun.
1. Read the book several times to yourself before you read it with the child so that the content, the layout and the pictures are all familiar to you.
2. Talk about the front cover with the child before you open the book. Ask the child what he thinks the story is about.
3. Use a variety of different voices for different characters. Not every parent is able to speak in a variety of accents. There are some very lucky children whose parents can. But you don't have to be a trained actor, or even an amateur to be able to make your voice interesting. You can whisper, you can shout, you can sound angry, or sad, silly, or intelligent. You can make your voice squeaky, deep or scary. At first you might feel silly, but I'm sure with practice you will learn to enjoy it. I know I do.
4. Adapt your voice to help create different atmospheres. Is the book scary or funny, serious or lighthearted, sad or happy? Using an appropriate tone of voice is far better than speaking in a boring monotone.
5. Encourage your child to join in. Remember how much you as a child enjoyed those repeated phrases: such as I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house down. Create a special signal to your child to let him know when it's time to join in: raise your hands, tilt your head, half close the book. The more dramatic, the better. Children also enjoy putting in missing words. This is particularly useful and educational if the story has a pattern of rhyme to it. For example: I'll... and I'll..., blow your house down.
6. Add sound effects or encourage your child to do so. Animal sounds, bird song, bells ringing, people snoring etc all add to the fun. Many authors add these to the text, but if they don't there's no reason you couldn't improvise.
7. Add actions too, silly walks, waving, driving a car. All these add greatly to the fun factor.
8. Pull funny faces to show feelings such as fear, joy, surprise etc. The more exaggerated these are the better.
9. Talk about the pictures on the pages and relate the text to the pictures. You might even encourage your child to guess the next word or words, using the picture to guide him.
10. Learn from the experts. Many well-known children's authors read their books at festivals or book shops. Storytellers also offer sessions in local libraries as well as at organized storytelling events. Look out for family literacy training at your child's school or ask to work as a volunteer there when literacy sessions are taking place. Last, but not least, listen to recorded books for inspiration.
Follow the ten tips, and make reading a pleasure, not a chore. You'll be glad you did, and so will your child.
Do you envy those people who are natural storytellers? Perhaps you want to make reading stories more fun, but lack the confidence or know-how? Below are 10 simple things you can do to help make reading stories more fun.
1. Read the book several times to yourself before you read it with the child so that the content, the layout and the pictures are all familiar to you.
2. Talk about the front cover with the child before you open the book. Ask the child what he thinks the story is about.
3. Use a variety of different voices for different characters. Not every parent is able to speak in a variety of accents. There are some very lucky children whose parents can. But you don't have to be a trained actor, or even an amateur to be able to make your voice interesting. You can whisper, you can shout, you can sound angry, or sad, silly, or intelligent. You can make your voice squeaky, deep or scary. At first you might feel silly, but I'm sure with practice you will learn to enjoy it. I know I do.
4. Adapt your voice to help create different atmospheres. Is the book scary or funny, serious or lighthearted, sad or happy? Using an appropriate tone of voice is far better than speaking in a boring monotone.
5. Encourage your child to join in. Remember how much you as a child enjoyed those repeated phrases: such as I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house down. Create a special signal to your child to let him know when it's time to join in: raise your hands, tilt your head, half close the book. The more dramatic, the better. Children also enjoy putting in missing words. This is particularly useful and educational if the story has a pattern of rhyme to it. For example: I'll... and I'll..., blow your house down.
6. Add sound effects or encourage your child to do so. Animal sounds, bird song, bells ringing, people snoring etc all add to the fun. Many authors add these to the text, but if they don't there's no reason you couldn't improvise.
7. Add actions too, silly walks, waving, driving a car. All these add greatly to the fun factor.
8. Pull funny faces to show feelings such as fear, joy, surprise etc. The more exaggerated these are the better.
9. Talk about the pictures on the pages and relate the text to the pictures. You might even encourage your child to guess the next word or words, using the picture to guide him.
10. Learn from the experts. Many well-known children's authors read their books at festivals or book shops. Storytellers also offer sessions in local libraries as well as at organized storytelling events. Look out for family literacy training at your child's school or ask to work as a volunteer there when literacy sessions are taking place. Last, but not least, listen to recorded books for inspiration.
Follow the ten tips, and make reading a pleasure, not a chore. You'll be glad you did, and so will your child.
CHOSEING A STORY BOOK FOR YOUR CHILD
CHOSEING A STORY BOOK FOR YOUR CHILD
There are so many storybooks available it is difficult to know which to choose. You will no doubt remember stories you enjoyed reading or having read to you as a child. But today's children have different needs and tastes.
Here are ten tips to help you choose storybooks:
1. Favourite authors: If your child loves a book by a particular author or authors, look for other books by the same person.
2. Series: Look for series of books with the same topics or characters.
3. Interests: Think about your child's interests (dinosaurs, foreign places, space, animals etc) and find storybooks with these as themes.
4. Topics: Match books to topics your child is studying at school or nursery. If you don't know what these are, then ask!
5. Reviews: Read reviews of storybooks and look at the children's books' bestsellers lists.
6. Your favourites: Try books you enjoy or enjoyed reading yourself. But don't be upset if your child doesn't share your enthusiasm!
7. Meet the author: Look out for opportunities to meet children's authors and hear them read. Writers and illustrators promote their books in libraries and schools, at book festivals, on television and radio, in magazines and newspapers and on the web.
8. Friends: Find out what your child's friends are reading and what their favourites are.
9. Experts: Ask your child's teacher, librarian or children's bookseller what is popular. Go to the library regularly and allow yourself plenty of time to browse.
10. Book clubs: Join a children's book club and encourage your child to choose from the catalogues or leaflets. Children sometimes bring these leaflets home from school or nursery.
Use these tips to help you choose suitable books for your child, but don't overlook the traditional stories such as fairytales, fables, myths and legends. Every child should have some good quality anthologies of traditional stories to enjoy as well as modern books they will want to read over and over again.
There are so many storybooks available it is difficult to know which to choose. You will no doubt remember stories you enjoyed reading or having read to you as a child. But today's children have different needs and tastes.
Here are ten tips to help you choose storybooks:
1. Favourite authors: If your child loves a book by a particular author or authors, look for other books by the same person.
2. Series: Look for series of books with the same topics or characters.
3. Interests: Think about your child's interests (dinosaurs, foreign places, space, animals etc) and find storybooks with these as themes.
4. Topics: Match books to topics your child is studying at school or nursery. If you don't know what these are, then ask!
5. Reviews: Read reviews of storybooks and look at the children's books' bestsellers lists.
6. Your favourites: Try books you enjoy or enjoyed reading yourself. But don't be upset if your child doesn't share your enthusiasm!
7. Meet the author: Look out for opportunities to meet children's authors and hear them read. Writers and illustrators promote their books in libraries and schools, at book festivals, on television and radio, in magazines and newspapers and on the web.
8. Friends: Find out what your child's friends are reading and what their favourites are.
9. Experts: Ask your child's teacher, librarian or children's bookseller what is popular. Go to the library regularly and allow yourself plenty of time to browse.
10. Book clubs: Join a children's book club and encourage your child to choose from the catalogues or leaflets. Children sometimes bring these leaflets home from school or nursery.
Use these tips to help you choose suitable books for your child, but don't overlook the traditional stories such as fairytales, fables, myths and legends. Every child should have some good quality anthologies of traditional stories to enjoy as well as modern books they will want to read over and over again.
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